In the past year, I've been working in educational
settings a lot more. Various age groups, various projects, various residencies relating to
Metis arts, Canadian history or themes on reconciliation. Although I had some
teaching experience, it is quite a different challenge to be standing in front
of an audience in a classroom or a theatre that is eagerly awaiting a talk
about stuff that is much more personal than teaching how to colour correct a beer can in Photoshop.
Sometimes it's difficult and painful but I keep doing it because it is
enjoyable to connect with so many people in an open yet largely safe forum.
Schools are meant for safe discourse after all. Yet, more than anything else, I
keep doing it because I just can't seem to get over being lied to throughout my
whole student career.
We were ALL lied to.
As I retreat to my studio in solitude on the days when I'm
not running a workshop or doing a talk, I try to reflect on why I'm still so
angry about it but the fact of the matter is I do know why. I’m angry because I
almost lost my culture. I’m angry because I’ve been forced to assimilate. I’m
angry because I’ve been working so hard to find my own identity all these years
while facing the reality that I will still never be accepted as who I am by
some. I’m angry because while I was lucky to be sitting in classrooms being “shaped
into an ideal female citizen” others (some of them kin) were being oppressed
simply because those who were brainwashing me wanted everything from those they
were oppressing. I’m angry because I protested vehemently against Apartheid in
my youth to the point of almost being kicked out of school but never knew until
just a few years ago that the regime was actually a Canadian invention! I’m
angry because the doctrine I was being force-fed to accept as being the only
true, fair, pure and just way of living was also actively supporting those who
were doing everything they could to conquer the original inhabitants who had
helped them survive in the “new world” only a few years previous. AND it’s
still happening today in Canada! It’s just evolved into a different form.
My conclusion during these times of reflection is always to
channel the anger, to do my part to help reconciliation by not only telling the
truth about Canadian history but by helping to find ways forward. There has to
be balance. It's one of the reasons why I created the Reconciliation 150 tshirts and student award. It's another reason why I chose to continue doing design and
illustration work for orgs like the Elementary Teacher's Federation of Ontario and Nelson Education -- because they are
also actively trying to create accurate, responsible and respectful content for
students who need to learn about Canada’s true history. It’s also a reason why I
tell kids the true meaning of the song “Ani Kuni” when we sing it and the real reason
why we don’t use our arms when we dance a jig. It’s why I will always be welcoming
to any person, young or old, who finds the courage to ask questions. At the
same time, I continue to create my art showing the positive aspects of my
personal experience because there really is a lot to be celebrated. I want
people to know the good stuff too.
Thankfully, there are so many researchers and academics who
are now working diligently to right the wrongs of the past. Here’s a shout out
to all the usually unsung heroes who have been working so hard to rewrite
Canada’s history. Dr. Olive Dickason, Arthur Ray, Jacqueline Peterson, JenniferS. H. Brown, Sebastien Malette, Sherry Ferrell Racette and Kim Anderson, just to name
a few. There are so many more hardworking researchers out there but these are
the academic authors whose work I’ve referred to over again to help guide me in
my own work. They are the ones sifting through and documenting the evidence. Their
work will help us all find a way toward reconciliation. Their work is what is
helping me find ways to disseminate my own truth, to find myself and reconnect
with a past I thought would never be found. Unbeknownst to them, they are part
of my “team” in my quest toward truth-driven education. I am grateful to them and all those who
are on the same path.
Upwards and onwards!
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